Certainly Not

Summary: A fireworks display brought some ideas to mind. Most things in life I anticipate and expect will happen and when they do happen they still suprise me, good and bad. It’s that area of uncertainty, depending how big this is determines how much things suprise, shock and effect you in life.
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Bombs in the sky
please our eye.
Don’t know why we look
we know what to expect.
I know what to expect.

Human traffic crawls
hear static growls.
Lots of interest here
we know what to expect.
I know what to expect.

Towards the sky
where spirits fly.
Wide eyed, open mouthed
we know what to expect.
I know what to expect.

It’s unexpected.

Envy

Summary: I go through my life pretty jealous and bitter about most things. Knowing I have to rely on people to live, wishing I could just do certain things, and wondering how that would effect my mentality. Thing is my jealousy is general not personal, guess that’s what I’m trying to get over here.
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Don’t worry.

My jealousy won’t stop me liking you.
It won’t stop me thinking of you.
It won’t stop me talking to you.
It won’t stop me caring about you.
It won’t stop me looking at you.
It won’t stop me admiring you.
It won’t stop me loving you.
It won’t stop me wanting you.

I worry.

Hopes and Fears

Summary: I can’t help but knick the title of this from my favourite album, but it just sums me up at the moment. I can’t committ to new patterns of life and new relationships even though I want to. I don’t know if I can and I know I wont find out til I try it. Is it a crime that I want the girl to chase me? Is it worth hurting people to find out if you can move onto the next stage of independance?
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Through the looking glass
I glimpse at my dreams,
holding on to the trembling ideals.
Inviting my soul to believe them.
Simple as they seem.

I’d like to be the beholder,
slip these chains from me.
Show me the place
where I can roam these sweet sensations
and taste the flavour of your soul.
Yellow water flows over me,
gremlins whisper behind me.
Staggering in grey aftermath,
hopes scattered,
paint the wall with my brains.
Lift me up again,
I want to fly with you
til we can’t see the overgrown gardens below.

Power of Will

Summary: I know a lot of people will be trying to put words to what happened in London, this is my take although its too early to fully reflect. Its ironic I was near New York when the bombings happened. Will is powerful, blind drive and used in careful moderation can be positive, but it’s very dangerous.
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Judge a concert by how much you cry.
Music is written by the young.
It describes your generation.
Takes immense thoughts to stir emotions.
Thoughts of times gone and to come.
Watch planes slide through the eerie Manhattan backdrop.
Subconscious shivers beneath a calm exterior.
Barely awake through clouds of sleep.
News breaks through of selfish human acts.
What seemed important is now irrelevant.
There’s nothing to understand here.
It was their will.

Exsistence

Summary: Things I’ve thought about since I was a child, about why matter exsists at all. The possibility of nothingness, no contrast. The realisation of this civilisation we’ve built and the psychological constraints we have.
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Dieticians tame us.
Politicians blame us.
Sitting on the same bus,
thinking of the Universe.

Found and Lost

Summary: I met a girl while in the USA, we clicked I thought but I guess I kind of let her go by. Do you find yourself constantly embarressing yourself by trying not to embarress yourself, or is it just me?
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She’s leaving.
I know I want her, I know she wants me.
We clicked.
Want to break away with her, but don’t know how.
Eyes locked.
Waiting for an opportunity, that never comes.
Gentle touch.
Aching to go with her, but I can’t take the risk.
Glances swapped.
We’ll stay in contact, until we move on.
Memories faded.
Her face was all I could see, I don’t know it no more.
She’s gone.

Insignificance

Summary: Just some pouring out of thoughts following my trip to the USA for the CP world games and the bombings in London. Being in America just makes you realise how insignificant you are and how big the world is. When it comes to the crunch we have to be selfish and look after ourself and the people we love more than ourself.
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Life in black and white.
Flowing stars and stripes.
Proud of what we are.
But in the end, what’s it for?

Life in black and white.
Filled with stuff you like.
Interests scattered so far.
Know now why I take the car.

Life in black and white.
So many people in lights.
How many do you adore?
Enough to give up more?

Life in black and white.
Nobody knows the right.
Show them the door.
Out of this colour-blind war.